Hello loves! Wow, it has been some time since I sat down and wrote to you all! Feels like I'm getting on a bicycle after not riding for several years. Unfortunately I haven't completely unpacked all of my belongings and I'm sort of at the point where I'm content with leaving part of my life in a box. I am actively working on building my next path and it will include moving to a home for Dallas and I; until then I will leave the remaining boxed. Have you ever felt that way? Its almost like I know where I currently am is a temporary fix to a permanent situation.
Anyways, I was surfing the web { do people still say that??? Or am I really showing my age after celebrating another year last Monday?!?!?} yesterday and came across this unique campaign aimed at sharing the creators vision of giving a silent help signal for individuals suffering from domestic abuse. Often times the abused feel they are unable to speak to anyone about what they are enduring because they fear their abuser will know or harm them for reaching out. The Black Dot Campaign was created as an idea of how to help those individuals who cannot speak up.
{photo posted on twitter page of Black Dot Campaign creator}
Although the "black dot" concept has not been used in training professionals who specialize in helping domestic abuse victims, it has already reached 4.8 million people creating awareness and allowing survivors to share their stories. The concept is that a victim places a black dot on their palm allowing that to be their silent way of asking for help. If it is safe for you to get them help, contact the authorities and do so. We must always remember how vulnerable these individuals are and that any intervention should be done by a professional.
This campaign really hit home to me and I wanted to share my story with you after getting wonderful feedback from my previous post. So many people reached out to me and shared their experiences as well as their support of my courage for being so open. It was the first post that I felt I had finally accomplished what I had created this blog to do. My past is full of experiences that have made me stronger and today's post was definitely a turning point in my life. About four years ago I met a man who was going to change my life, for the worst. He was the definition of a sleazy salesman that could sell you a winter coat in the middle of the desert. He was a self centered individual who lived life thinking that every soul he came across owed him something. At the time I was caught up in helping (remember my last post?) him and showing him how I could make everything better, that I didn't see how toxic of a person he was. He literally could do no wrong in my eyes even though he hadn't shown he could do any right. I let friendships, family relationships and even professional relationships suffer throughout the two years we dated. (Just writing that makes me emotional because even though I was lucky enough to be able to piece back certain relations, others are gone forever.) Somewhere within the two years the relationship took a turn for the worst and he became verbally abusive. I do not claim to be professionally educated on verbal abuse, I can only share with you my story. It is extremely important to be aware that abuse can come in many forms whether it be verbal, mental or physical. Each type of abuse can create an everlasting affect on someone and should not be tolerated in any form. One is not more acceptable than the other- abuse in any form is flat out WRONG. For me, the abuse was verbal/mental. My abuser would belittle me and call me names. Then after doing so he would tell me he loved me and that he wished we didn't have to argue. The "arguments" were him telling me he was right and that I should see things the way he saw them. I can still remember the very last one we ever had that broke me. The words he spoke will forever be branded into my memory like an internal tattoo. There was a time I was so broken and had expressed to him my loss of self and extreme sorrow. His response, my abuser, the man who supposedly "loved me" was "It's okay, you don't need to be here much longer anyways". It wasn't until I reached out for professional assistance did I realize what was going on. It was in that moment sitting with a complete stranger that my experience was heard, validated and a path for recovery was paved. I was given a book called The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans, that opened up my eyes to all of the little things that at the time I was calling signs of "love" instead of validating them as signs of abuse. I am blessed that my abuser was someone that I could walk away from and that I can stand up to today. I was blessed to be able to overcome the abuse and to have been able to reach out for help, since I know many are not in the position to do so. I guess that is why this campaign hits so close to home for me. I want every man and woman to feel the respect and happiness I feel for myself every day, because they deserve it. They don't deserve to have someone abuse them, show them negativity and bring them down. I hope that my experience will give someone else the strength to leave a negative situation in result of a positive life that is full of endless possibilites.
Please join me on social media and support this campaign. Draw a black dot on your palm, snap a quick picture and hashtag it using #blackdotcampaign . If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook you have already seen my shot, but if not head on over and follow me!
{photo from my Instagram account}
Sending you all tons of peace, love and happiness!
Until next time loves!!
Miss Michelle Eva
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